Got Uterus. Will Have Baby. Not!

  • 0
  • November 30, 2014

Are we all supposed to want to have a child? Is it really so awful to not want to have one?

A few weeks ago, a friend asked me if I was still hoping to have a baby. I took a deep breath and braced myself before saying NO.

To my surprise, she accepted my reply without batting an eyelash. No questions asked.

Wow. That was a first. My aversion to having a child usually receives an are-you-out-of-your-mind expression followed by lengthy questioning and a barrage of reasons why it would be a shame for me to not have an offspring.

I MUST want to be a mother. I MUST want to have a baby, at least one.

But I don’t want to be a mother. I don’t want to have a baby.

I never did.

I was told that the desire to carry a child will kick in when I get older. I’m almost 40 and while I have imagined myself taking on a thousand roles, being a mom was never among them.

So what does that make me?

To those who insist that I must want to be a mother, I must want to have a baby, you’re free to call me whatever you want. Just leave me and my decision alone.

But bear in mind that I am free to call you whatever I want too.

If you can’t respect my choice, don’t expect me to respect you either.


  • Kate says:

    Hear, hear! While I’m a little more open to having kids now, it’s still not my priority. In this country, not following the traditional path of women gets you labeled, ostracized, and misjudged. The irony? Majority of married mothers I know use their children as coverup for their unhappiness.

    • Nana Nadal says:

      Society is way too mean to single women, much more to single women without kids or those who refuse to have them. Yes, super ironic. Because while these mothers were convincing me to have a child (or at least WANT to have a child), they’re also dying to send their kids to school to get them out of their hair. Labo! My dad always tells me that misery loves company and that’s really all there is to this convincing me to want to have a child issue. Naghahanap lang daw ng kadamay yung mga unhappy. Haha!

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